Second Guessing

Ever have those nights when you say "ahh forget sleep!" and start second guessing some things in your life?

Feel God calling you to prayer about certain things you thought were pretty much figured out?


I have a lot of praying to do... I have this feeling that God's about to do something pretty big in my life. I want to be ready, but at the same time I don't want to expect anything. One day at a time, planning out one weekend at a time--except for running, of course, which takes up most of my weekends! I am trying so hard to be patient, yet I'm trying not to define what it is I'm waiting for. God knows, and He won't let me miss it. It's not going to slip by me :) Loud and clear, I pray. I'm done living by the standards of this world, and people-pleasing... it gets me no credit with my Savior.  I refuse to follow advice that I know won't please God. I admit sometimes all I want is to do what everybody else is doing. It's that part of me that I have to battle... some instances are getting easier to beat than others. I'm working on it, God's working on it.

It comforts me to know that He has me by the hand. He's guiding me, and I'm living for Him. I feel confident that God will direct me where He needs me, when He needs me. He's done it so many times before.
He's the one that I live for, and the one I was born to love. No one else can take that place. It takes a quiet day like this to remind me to focus and to seek Him so much more.  I am so thankful for the blessing of this day.  Instead of that terrible anxiety I'd feel, I'm smiling.  I'm not sure if this was intentional or not, but retrospectively it was so wise and needed.  God, You have my heart. Do with it what You will  :]

As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more...