I Grew Today

I grew today.
Not in height or girth (girth is a funny word to me) but in faith.
I grew in trust.
I died a little more, and it wasn't any fun.
I felt like a weirdo, and uncomfortable. Extreme. Rash. Silly, even.
Yet, I'd do it again without hesitation. Do I hope I don't have to? Yes!
But if it comes up again, I will be a weirdo again.

I'm a 24-year-old single woman. I am getting to see and talk to many people from my childhood, and several of which are my friends from elementary school. A few of us hung out and had dinner as a group.
Then what innocently started as a continuation of keeping in touch became the making of plans to hang out again with one of said friends.

Dun dun dun: alone.

Oh boy.

This should have struck my uh oh radar right off the bat, but it didn't.
Yes, I'm that silly of a dodo, that I didn't see any issue with this until I gave it thought.
Honestly, I hadn't even given it thought! Two friends hanging out, no big deal.

Then the questions started popping up from my family:
"Who is that?" "What does he do?" "Oh? He asked you out?" "Where are you guys going?" "Do you like him?"

ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding goes my uh oh radar


No! We are friends, from school! 

Here arises the age-old debate "can a man and a woman be just friends in such a setting?"


Nope.

Call me a weirdo, an extremist, a silly person, but I say nay. I no longer hang out one-on-one with opposite sex friends. No siree bob. No can do. Not even if they knew me when my bangs were ridiculous.

So I wrote a lame "sorry to flake on you, but it's not a good idea for me to hang out outside of a group setting, you're more than invited when an event arises in a group setting" note and I'm feeling really old-fashioned and odd.

Who would have thought I could do this?
Walk away from a date setting, to honor my single season?

Thank You Daddy, for giving me strength and room to grow.

It's okay that I feel silly and extreme, for Your glory.

I trust You blindly with my heart.

I trust Your timing, Your plans, and Your calling for me.

I love You more than words can say.