Rebuked

"He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise."
-Proverbs 15:31

Loud and clear, I heard it.
I felt that sinking feeling, the one we feel when we're reprimanded in front of the whole class. I messed up.

What I did may sound silly to you. You're probably gonna snicker and think "Helena, that's not even bad." Trust me though, it was.

You know when you go to a restaurant and you order the same thing, because you've had it before and you know how it tastes and what to expect?

I ordered cheese pizza.

Nothing wrong with cheese pizza, but as I looked through the menu, I saw different combinations, different foods, crazy toppings, and I was hungry.
I had decided in my mind that I would try something different, get a little crazy, if you will. Then, as the server took the order, I defaulted back to cheese pizza.


Menus taken away, server out of sight, chatter resumed, and then it hit me.

I found myself waiting for cheese pizza. Seriously?

Enough time passed for me to think about this decision, and I realized that I do this in several areas of my life. I default back to what I feel is familiar, choosing things I feel I can control. When I got home from the race, for example, the first thing I did was apply to a hospital. Why not work at a place I've worked for the last 3 years? That's logical.

However, the Lord has given me an alternate plan and a deeper hunger.

It takes a lot more faith and trust to go on a limb, try new things, allow myself to be surprised, and not order the cheese pizza of life.

Jesus is teaching me that courage.
He keeps assuring me that there is more in store for me than I can imagine and keep trying to choose for myself.
He is daring me to try, to ask, to seek, to knock.


In His rebuke, He said 'you know better than to ask little of me.'

Busted. Rebuked.

More, please. Surprise me. 

It Starts Here

As I drove into Laurel Park to run its mile loop, I began looking for the trail start. I didn’t see it, but I spotted the half-mile mark. Good enough, I thought. I parked my car and began my run. 

Halfway through the loop, I found the real start sign. 

Most of you know I feel called to women’s ministry, but I didn’t know where to start. 

I followed the Lord’s leading to Georgia, of all places, and hit the ground running.

I’ve been serving in the Adventures In Missions office and taking classes in the afternoon, as part of the Center for Global Action (CGA) curriculum. I've been meeting with several people who have taken me under their wings, people whose words I take to heart and whose faith I admire. I even signed up for a web design class! I started attending Revolution Church and now I am one of the leaders for their brand-new youth group, Recourse.

The pace has been wild and new, but I kept on running.
Lo and behold, I spotted my start sign...

Leading a Bible study!

The very first Phylla House Bible Study for divorced and widowed women will be here in Gainesville, Georgia. It’ll be 7 weeks long, meeting on Mondays, from 6 to 8pm.  With the Lord’s blessing, there will be ladies who are willing to meet and allow me to lead them in a very special study through relevant and sensitive subjects. It kicks off April 8^th and goes until May 20^th.  If you’re interested and available, send me an email at phyllahouse@gmail.com.

I've been working on the website, and it isn't much yet but I'm learning: phyllahouse.com

The Lord is calling and I'm answering.

How’s that for a start?

Numbers: come to your census

I thought having Leviticus punch me in the gut was bad…

I moved on to Numbers, thinking, “surely I won’t learn much here”

But again, I was schooled.

God loves numbers. He loves counting. He loves measuring. God is super good at math. I think it’s safe to say God did whisper to me the answers in Calculus when I prayed those desperate prayers before tests. 

God promises to rescue us, a lot. 

Oh and God loves to party. He likes it when we have fun, aka rejoice. 

God also loved rules back when… phew. Lots of special rules and hoops to jump through, and He made sure to communicate allllllllll of them to Moses. 

Reading Numbers, I learned a lot. I learned that I should never beat a donkey. I also learned that if a donkey ever speaks reason into me, I’m probably the one acting like a… ahem… donkey. And that people who beat donkeys end up dying by sword wound a few chapters later. 

I learned that God hates it when we reject His plan for us, especially over food preferences. I definitely had a peanut butter heart check.

God says “I am giving you the service of ____________ as a gift” in Chapter 18… serving God is a God-given gift! Thank You, Lord, for redundancy and grace!

Back in the day, God solved impatience with venomous snakes. Thank You Jesus, for sparing me from the snakes. 

I learned that one does not simply walk into Edom. If you get this reference, you are a very special breed and I love you so much. 

God loves musicals… People are always bursting into song in the Bible, even in the most random places. It adds to my amusement when I sing the songs in my own weird way. (Sidenote: if I’m reading a book by a British author, I read it with a Brit accent in my head [I kid you not!] and you should have seen me smiling while reading a book by KP Yohannan, who is from India, because [yep, you guessed it] I read it with an Indian accent in my head. I should probably add the note here that when the donkey spoke in Chapter 22, I read it with the same accent as the donkey in Shrek… and it was super funny.) I should probably make a video of me singing the Song of Moses hahaha I am ridiculous sometimes, I do acknowledge this. I think it makes Jesus laugh, so I keep on :]

So Moses and Aaron screw up big time. They disobey God and lose out on the promise land. Total bummer. 

Miriam gets leprosy for a week because she ran her mouth. Seriously, guys, we should be SO thankful for Christ. Can you imagine getting leprosy for talking some smack? We would go bananas.

Then in the end of Numbers, God has the Israelites run another census after the plagues and the battles and the epic sinner smite-a-thon that took place. 

They count all the people, they count lots of gold. 

I, in turn, counted my blessings.